OUR SERVICES | Aardbard

General Guidelines

We will collect payment after we complete your request. No payment is required up front.
Sometimes, for whatever reason, we can’t make you a happy customer. You have three refusals, if the work we produce does not meet your satisfaction. If the work isn’t acceptable within three tries, we will end the transaction and you owe no gold.
We do not write pieces which are offensive, pornographic or defamatory. Please do not waste your time and ours by asking.
We ask that you inquire about your project status if you happen to have sent a request shortly before reboot. Please a copy of your request on hand in case there is a need forto your original documents.

Object Restrings
(Bard does haute fashion)

Price: 100,000 gold

This includes both the short description as well as the long description of an item. Post a note to Bard on the personal board and tell us what type of theme or genre you are interested in; color codes are allowed. Please be sure you include the list of colors you do and do not want us to use when making it for you. We will post your restring on the personal board.

Room Descriptions
(Bard does home improvement)

Price: 100,000 gold + 10,000 gold per line

This includes manors, manor porches, and even clan rooms. It also includes the description of your own character (help description). Once you decide on a type of description post a note to Bard on the personal board telling us what type of description you are interested in (example: underwater, romantic, wildlife). Please remember to tell us how long you want the description to be in lines (example: more than 20 lines, less than 50 lines). If you are unsure of how large your screen then use help scroll to help determine an appropriate length. Once we have written your description we will post it to you on the personal board.

ASCII Art
(Bard does murals)

Price: 1,500,000 gold per picture

If you ever feel the need for ASCII Art in a place such as a manor, description, clan room or even just a note then post a note to Bard on the personal board asking us about a specific picture. If you are not specific about what type of picture you want then your note might be ignored due to misunderstanding. The same price applies to ASCII Art with or without colour, what a deal!

Poetry and Performance
(Bard does event planning)

Price: starts at 500,000 gold, by consultation

Having a bar mitzvah with your flist? A clannie’s night out following a victorious raid? A dewy-eyed white wedding? Not only would we sit down to discuss with you the options for your venue, but we may bring live Bardly entertainment. What better than to praise your exploits through song, poetry, and revelry? To make your event complete, we’ll make sure that the portals are set up just right to keep your guests flowing in.

Critique
(Bard does play-by-play commentary)

Price: by donation, pay what you can

If you have poetry, papers, illustration, or any other sort of art that you’d like some feedback for, send us a tell. For smaller works such as short poetry, you may wish to post in the body of a note to Bards. Otherwise, it is recommended that you give us an external link. Of course, you don’t have to like what we say, nor should you be obliged to follow it. However, we maintain that we uphold a formidable standard of critique and strive to give you a clear and objective response to your work. The price of this service is by donation, after you’ve heard our commentary upon your artwork.